I asked myself recently, after sitting down with my parents one Sunday evening to talk about their Wills and Inheritance Tax planning, that if I was not a Private Client Solicitor, would we even be having these conversations?
I have seen it many times, both professionally and among friends, discussions simply are not had soon enough.
I always try to encourage open conversations about the future. Here are five questions that everyone can ask their parents that could help to prevent uncertainty, stress and conflict at a time when emotions are often high.
1. Do you have a valid and up to date Will?
My parents had Wills that were prepared about 20 years ago, when the Inheritance Tax landscape was different. Our family set-up has also changed significantly since then. My brother and I are now part of blended families, and the line of inheritance is no longer straightforward.
An up-to-date Will should:
- Reflect current wishes
- Take account of remarriage or divorce
- Consider whether stepchildren are to benefit
- Appoint appropriate executors
Appointing siblings 20 years ago may have made sense at the time. Now, appointing adult children may be more practical.
Outdated Wills can be almost as problematic as having none at all.
2. Do you have a Power of Attorney in place?
A Will only takes effect on death. It does not help during lifetime.
Consider what would happen if capacity were lost tomorrow:
- Who would manage finances?
- Who would make medical decisions?
Some parents may have an Enduring Power of Attorney covering finances, but in that case a Lasting Power of Attorney for Health and Welfare is equally important.
Without Powers of Attorney, families often face a lengthy and expensive Court application at an already stressful time.
3. Where are your important documents kept?
I have encountered many situations where families:
- Do not know who holds the original Will
- Cannot locate title deeds
- Are unsure whether Powers of Attorney were made let alone ever registered
On that same Sunday, my mum handed me an envelope with what she believed contained the deeds to her property. They were indeed her deeds but fortunately the property was registered. Had it been keeping them in a drawer at home would have been far more concerning.
A Power of Attorney, Enduring or Lasting, may have been prepared and signed by the attorneys but that might have been years ago. It may be forgotten about and it is therefore important to know where these are stored, are they registered and do they need to be.
Knowing where important documents are kept can remove enormous stress when it matters most.
4. Are there any specific wishes we should know about?
This isn’t just about money.
It includes:
- Funeral wishes
- Sentimental items
- Charitable gifts
- Personal messages or instructions
Often the first conversation after someone passes away is about the funeral. If those wishes have been discussed, or even written down, it makes decision making much easier. I have come across full instructions from who should be the funeral directors right through to the full service to take place as well as simple instructions on cremation or burial and whether there is a burial plot already.
I have also seen disagreements arise over small sentimental items of little financial value. If something has been promised to a particular child or beneficiary, a written note alongside the Will can prevent misunderstandings.
Having clear instructions and expectations can ensure clarity at a stressful time.
5. Have you reviewed Inheritance Tax and Estate Planning?
This can be the most difficult conversation. No one particularly wants to ask their parents what they are worth.
However, with rising property values and frozen tax thresholds, many families now find themselves approaching or exceeding the Inheritance Tax limits.
Even if tax is not an issue, careful estate planning can:
- Protect beneficiaries
- Safeguard a surviving spouse
- Reduce the risk of disputes
- Ensure assets pass as intended
Talking about death can feel uncomfortable, but in my experience, these are not morbid conversations rather showing you care.
My parents left that Sunday evening feeling reassured. We had clarity around their Wills, their funeral wishes and what steps were needed next.
Estate planning is not just about assets it is about making things easier for the people having to deal with things at the end.
If reading this has prompted you to think, “We really should have that conversation,” don’t leave it too long.
A short discussion now can prevent significant stress later.
How Elite Law Solicitors can help
How Elite Law Solicitors can helpNaomi Dyer qualified as a solicitor in 2008 and brings over 18 years of specialist experience in Private Client Law. She has built a strong reputation for providing clear, thoughtful and personalised legal advice to individuals and families. Naomi is known for her ability to navigate complex personal, financial and family circumstances with clarity, discretion and strategic insight.
Naomi’s expertise covers all aspects of Wills, Trusts, Estate Planning, Lasting Powers of Attorney and the Administration of Estates. She is dedicated to delivering a high‑quality, approachable service and is committed to achieving the best possible outcomes for every client she works with.
If you would like guidance on reviewing Wills, Powers of Attorney or Inheritance Tax planning, get in touch with Naomi by calling 0800 086 2929, emailing info@elitelawsolicitors.co.uk or by completing our Free Online Enquiry Form.
The content of this article is for general information only. The information in this article is not legal or professional advice. If you require legal or professional advice you should obtain independent expert advice from qualified Private Client Lawyers such as those within our firm.
